Self-Sufficiency - I provide
Being in control of providing for your own needs is an essential life skill. It can be seductive trap to lean on other people to provide for your foundational needs, especially if that person can provide an upgrade to what you can provide for yourself. Falling into a comfort trap can also be a reason to let others provide for you, as they tackle stressful or hard-working situations to provide for your needs, that you feel unable to face for yourself. Sometimes it feels easier to let others do those things that you find difficult or challenging rather than face up to learning how to do them yourself. The foundational areas of your life include earning and managing your finances, providing a secure home, being responsible for your safety and your health.
It is more than just important for your self-confidence, it’s self-empowerment. If you can provide for yourself, you can choose how, when and to what standard your needs are met. You can decide which needs to prioritise and which can wait. Live to your time table and do things the way that you want. Self-sufficiency is the freedom to live your life on your own terms, to protect yourself, follow your dreams and make your own decisions.
Everyone needs to rely on other people sometimes and there are circumstances where you need to share responsibility or control, such as being parents, business partners or sharing a mortgage. There are many benefits though to relying on yourself to provide for your needs. Self-efficacy is the confidence in your ability to learn new skills, self-sufficiency is putting them into practice. Being self-sufficient can help you with:-
• Protection from dangerous situations or exploitation
If you are in control of your basic essentials then you can control the circumstances that keep you safe. You know that you can keep yourself away from danger or have skills to get yourself out of it. You can decide how you travel to a place, if you will be left on your own, what time you will arrive or leave, or if you will even go to a place in the first place.
Being in change of your life means that you are not held to ransom, where there are threats to remove or not action things that you want/need unless you comply to doing other things. You also won’t have to ‘put up’ with things in your life because a certain someone provides or controls essential parts of your life. If you are in control of your life situations then you are at less risk of being exploited or scammed by those that know better and wish to change things to their benefit.
• Not waiting on other’s timescales
Being able to action things yourself means that you are not waiting on others, who may not be prioritising actioning your needs as you’d like or as you need. With self-sufficiency, your growth can happen on your terms and to your timetable and done the way that you prefer.
• Boost your self-confidence
Once you are in control of your life you can gain confidence, and pride in yourself, by feeling more independent. With growing skills and responsibility, comes a feeling of importance, value and confidence in your abilities. Feel yourself becoming a bigger person in the world, equal in value to everyone else.
• Have things done your way
One thing about being the driver of the essential parts of your life is that you can do the things that you enjoy without having to follow others (who are in control) with their interests. You can be sure that with self-sufficiency you can follow your own joy, your own interests and do things that truly make you happy. If you have a particular vibe, style, method or thoughts about how something should be done, you are free, with self-sufficiency skills, to do things to the standard and style that you prefer. Do you prefer to be creative, thoughtful, make an effort, express yourself, make a fuss, be quiet and alone, rest and recuperate, socialise or be reflective. Where is your focus? Be free to follow it.
The core areas
• Essentials
Make sure that you provide the important basics in your life:-
An income that provides you with what you need and want in life
Provide yourself with a home that you own or control, that fits your standards and lifestyle
A lifestyle that allows you to follow your interests and bring fun, joy and happiness into your life. Relax be calm and enjoy life.
Be able to nurture your health (diet, exercise, medication)
Be in control of ensuring your safety
• Driving / Travel
Being able to transport yourself around is important for safety, independence and protection. Driving is one important skill to learn but this may not be possible in some cases due to health. Learn to be able to get yourself around by your own efforts, even if this is being an expert on bus travel, taxis or being able to read a map correctly. Know how to figure out where you are and how to get where you are going safely.
• Self learning
Learn to teach yourself new skills. Don’t wait on others to teach you things or wait on getting a course, learn to watch, ask questions and learn from other’s mistakes and wins. Copy others and how they do things. This can be having the courage to enrol on courses by yourself or teaching yourself by self-research. There are lots of free resource these days with the internet, just find the time in your diary. Maybe offer your time for free to get experience. Do things in your spare time if you are serious about learning a new skill or area of interest. Don’t leave your learning journey for others to drive.
How to grow
• Learn skills & be in control of your core life areas
Have a growth mindset. Build useful skills, be brave, resilient and confident and take charge of things in your life where you can. Build your core self-efficacy skills. Don’t base your value on winning all time. Some of the best lessons are learnt from trying failing, changing and trying again. As easy as it may be to let others do your hard jobs for you, it’s in your best interest to learn to take care of your own life, however scary, challenging or hard work that may be.
• Self-discipline & responsibility
Learn to plan and be disciplined, know how to plan your time and jobs so that you project manage your life efficiently. Build self-discipline so that you can keep focused on your journey and be consistent in the long term. Be accepting of taking on the dull but essential tasks. We can judge ourselves sometimes on the jobs we do, like taking on ‘low level’ tasks makes us low status. Some of the most successful people have been cleaners, runners, drivers or service providers. It’s better to have something less shiny that’s yours, than let others control you with more glitzy options.
Skills to work on:-
Your income: even if you have to do free work to get in the door, two jobs, extra part time ‘low status’ jobs or start at the bottom. Work towards your dreams, goals and learn the skills, or growth your savings.
A home: try to own your own home or share owing one with someone you trust and can get along with. A safe calm home is essential.
Self improvement: always have a life goal and work towards it. Don’t think about the now, imagine where you’re heading.
Growth mindset: Sometimes you have to work hard if you want to achieve the life you dream of. Be tough, don’t give up, be resilient to challenges.
Read more…Self-efficiacy: This skill will help you to be more self-sufficient. Build your skills in this area. Read more…